There are a number of systems theories, or "boundaries", that help our family relationships develop in a healthy manner, or at least increase understanding within an intimate group of people. Lets review them!
Exchange Theory
This is based on the "What's in it for me?" mentality when deciding to do or say something. For example, a husband might think that if he cleans the kitchen his wife will be more likely to make him a delicious dinner. In this story we see that the motivation to lean the kitchen wasn't necessarily love or duty, but rather the hope to get a good meal out of doing something for someone else.
Symbolic Interaction Theory
Do you ever analyze what you do or consider the consequences outside influences have upon your actions? In this theory our habits and actions are looked at and interpreted while taking into consideration the experiences that surround us. This theory allows for analysis of what these interactions mean to us and to other people. An example of could be how a couple who originally wants to have only two or three kids rethink their future family size after interacting with a family consisting of eight children.
Conflict Theory
Conflict is typically looked at as something bad, but that may not always be the case. This theory does include what I would call "negative conflict", where there is a struggle between persons for control or power often carried about by arguing and fighting. But I can also see something I call "positive conflict" in it. It's true that when two people marry they are bringing different ideas, interests, needs, and goals together, along with similar ones, however, this doesn't mean that when there is a disagreement, or in other words conflict, that it's bad. As stated in class, "how we handle the conflict [is what] can be good or bad." Learning from one another's points of view, adapting our dreams to someone else's, or incorporating additional ways of doing things to the list of our own can be wonderful outcomes to what we might consider a "conflict" or "problem".
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